turninglifespaiges

I have some of the closest people in my life going through a very difficult time. I feel empathy for their situation but useless for the help I can give.

Decisions will be made, actions may or may not be taken. I want to help, but I can’t. For nothing I could ever say would change their mind. They have to want to change on their own. They have to commit to living a different life by themselves.

I’ve been in a similar situation before. What it taught me was to be there when called, but don’t offer any additional help unless requested. It feels so harsh sometimes, but it’s the better route. The person may not want the help, and I can’t waste energy that I have for someone who doesn’t desire it.

I feel that my opinion may come off very negative. But in fact it’s with respect I say this view. People become stronger when they dig within themselves to search inside their minds and hearts to fix and change what they need to. It sticks more and means more to the person. More than I could ever do for them.

So if you’re going through something, I will reach out once to help. I’ll offer my shoulder and my ear once. Not because I don’t want to help, but I want you to help yourself. When you’re ready to stand up, I’ll grab you; when you’re ready to talk I’ll listen. But I’ll respect your space to think everything over until you call me. Trust me, it’s for you. I’ll be here when you need me to, and no earlier.

I’ll be there when you’re ready for me to help.